Fari

Fàri las Lamos (1960–2015) is a Spanish-Hylian mercenary who eats birds, babies, and Yoshi eggs. He is the king's guard, executioner, chief of police, and future murderer.

Biography
Fari was born in Spain in 1960 to unknown parents. He ended up eating his sister, and then grew up and decided to join Viacom. He later left Earth and served Duke Onkled of Gamelon, but turned against Duke Onkled when the duke joined Ganon. After that, Fari became King Harkinian's bodyguard.

Trivia

 * He was briefly Zelda's boyfriend, but the King ended the relationship.
 * Just for the heck of it, he often accuses random people of being traitors.
 * He once raped Duke Onkled for no reason.

Quotes

 * "Here's the traitor, your majesty!"
 * "Yes, my liege."
 * "Hey!"
 * "Duke Onkled betrayed the king!"
 * "I'll make sure he doesn't get away!"